哈佛幸福课 课件 1504 07 perfection.ppt

Applying the 3 P’s… 1. Permission Acceptance Respect for reality 2. Positive Benefit finding Failure as opportunity Distracting 3. Perspective Don’t sweat the small stuff… Psychological maturity Nature to be commanded must be obeyed. Francis Bacon * * Perfec onizm ti Outline What is Perfectionism? Characteristics Consequences Success and Happiness Sources of Perfectionism Overcoming Perfectionism Learn to fail or fail to learn Crisis (Wei Ji) Danger and Opportunity “The greatest mistake a man can make is to be afraid of making one.” Elbert Hubbard The Path of Failure Age 22: Lost job Age 23: Defeated for state legislature Age 24: Failed in business Age 27: Nervous breakdown Age 34: Ran for congress and defeated Age 39: Defeated again Age 46: Ran for senate and defeated Age 47: Defeated for nomination for vice president Age 50: Defeated again for senate Age 51: 16th US President “Freedom is not worth having if it does not connote freedom to err.” Mohandas Gandhi “The important work of moving the world forward does not wait to be done by perfect men.” George Eliot Thomas Watson Sr. IBM Amy Edmondson (1999) “Psychological Safety” “If you want to increase your success rate, double your failure rate.” Thomas Watson Sr. “Origins of Genius” (Simonton, 1999) Fail your way to success (Klem, 1997) Perfectionism is an incapacitating fear of failure that permeates our lives, especially those areas that we care about most. It is an approach, a cognitive and emotional schema, that we hold toward the journey of our lives, toward the process of getting from point A to point B. Perfection Vs. Excellence Characteristics Defensive Open to Suggestions Half Empty Half Full Over Generalize Realistic No Self-Acceptance Unconditional Acceptance Static Dynamic Perfection Excellence Fear of failure Failure as feedback Focus on Destination Journey and Destination Perfection Vs. Excellence Consequences Temporary Relief Lasting Satisfaction Inevitabl