What’s Your Emotional IQ.docx

What’s Your Emotional IQ?By Daniel GolemanIt was a steamy afternoon in New York City, the kind of day that makes people sullen with discomfort. I was heading to my hotel, and as I stepped onto a bus, I was greeted by the driver, a middle-aged man with an enthusiastic smile. “Hi! How are you doing?” he said. He greeted each rider in the same way. As the bus crawled uptown through gridlocked traffic, the driver gave a lively commentary: there was a terrific sale at that store … a wonderful exhibit at this museum … had we heard about the movie that just opened down the block? By the time people got off, they had shaken off their sullen shells. When the driver called out, “So long, have a great day!” each of us gave a smiling response. That memory has stayed with me for close to 20 years. I consider the bus driver a man who was truly successful at what he did. Contrast him with Jason, a straight-A student at a Florida high school who was fixated on getting into Harvard Medical School. When a physics teacher gave Jason an 80 on a quiz, the boy believed his dream was in jeopardy. He took a butcher knife to school, and in a struggle the teacher was stabbed in the collarbone. How could someone of obvious intelligence do something so irrational? The answer is that high I.Q. does not necessarily predict who will succeed in life. Psychologists agree that I.Q. contributes only about 20 percent of the factors that determine success. A full 80 percent comes from other factors, including what I call emotional intelligence. Following are some of the major qualities that make up emotional intelligence, and how they can be developed: 1. Self-awareness. The ability to recognize a feeling as it happens is the keystone of emotional intelligence. People with greater certainty about their emotions are better pilots of their lives.Developing self-awareness requires tuning in to what neurologist Antonio Damasio, in his book Descartes’ Error, calls somatic markers——literally, gut feelings. G