Module 1 PS典型问题.docx

『必读』Module 1 PS典型问题静思说过，上完第一趟课后大家的好日子就结束了！之后的日子就是无休无止的写材料！筒子们：你们准备好了吗？为了更好的让大家提前定稿，今天静思就先把ps集训时的第一份材料拿出来贴在论坛上，每一个人请务必仔细研究，研究透后好好写自己的ps，大家写的每一个版本的ps我都会去看，也都会去点评，希望每位筒子都能按时且有质量的完成作业！静思期待看到每一个人的进步！！！ Module 1 PS典型问题 大家在写PS的时候，典型的问题如下：1. 重复罗嗦：用2-3句话去表述同一个意思，或者在AS中，完全罗列步骤，不思考哪些步骤需要留，哪些可以删掉；2. 没有Point：看完一段，完全不知道这个同学想写什么，貌似就是写了一个故事；3. 没有Point之进阶版---挂羊头卖狗肉：貌似这一段是有Point的，但是呢，后面的事例和这个Point完全没有关系；4. 不够优秀：没有把自己究竟做的好在哪里，有多好写清楚。现在，静思一一举例，来跟大家分析一下，究竟这些错误是什么样子的，以及如何修改！? ?? ???1. 重复罗嗦I regard practicability as an important factor of design. I learned ergonomics, materials technique, methods of innovation products like iNPD, product design, which made the design reasonable. And I have a good command of structure and modeling. In my third year in collage, I achieved my long-cherished wish to make a castle like the one in Harry Potter during my model course. The biggest difference we made our model from others was we built a full-view architectural complex rather than a single model. As a team leader, I spent a few days gathering the details and version from the series novels and movies. I retained as much details as possible. I changed parts of the castle on profile and structure and made it easier to produce. It was a biggest project that there was no team had ever dealt with, it meant we had tons of handwork to do. So we made the whole process was just like an assembly line: 3 boys did the rough machining, and the left 3 girls made the pieces delicately. After this, the processes of assemble, spraying paint, making the setting and decorating just looked easier. Finally, we made a 800×1200 full view model of Hogwarts castle and got the highest score.分析：I regard practicability as an important factor of design.【有用，是Point！意思是我的实践能力是很好的！那我们来分析，她这段的内容，是哪些是不需要写的呢？】I learned ergonomics, materials technique, methods of innovation products like iNPD, product design, which made the design reasonable.（这些是所有的人都要学的吗？如果是，你光写你学过不显得你好吧，至少要说说，你学的有多吧！which made XXX是废话，老师会不知道吗？）And I have a good comm