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SCENE 1
BRYCE: All I ever wan ted was for Juli Baker to leave me alon e. It all bega n in the summer of 1957, before the start of sec ond grade.
STEVEN: Here we are.
PATSY: Ha, ha. What do you guys think?
LYNETTA: I like this place.
BRYCE: Its cool.
LYNETTA: Uh, what color is my room?
PATSY: Just you wait.
BRYCE: Lets see whats in side.
STEVEN: Hey, come on, buddy Bryce. Why dont, uh, you and I go help uni oad the van and the womenfolk here can get in the kitche n and start sett ing up.
BRYCE: Okay, Dad.
BRYCE: For me, it was the beg inning of what would be more tha n half a decade of strategic avoida nee and social discomfort. JULI: Hi, Im Juli Baker.
STEVEN: Hey, hey, what are you doi ng? JULI: Dont you want some help?
STEVEN: No. Theres some valuable thi ngs in there.
JULI: - How about this one?
STEVEN: No, no, no. Run home. Your mothers probably wondering where you are.
JULI: Oh, no, my mom knows where I am. She said its fine.
BRYCE: It did nt take long to realize this girl could not take a hint.
STEVEN: Its crowded in here with three
people.
JULI: I dont mind.
BRYCE: Of any kin d.
JULI: You wanna push this one together? STEVEN: Bryce, is nt it time for you to go help your mother?
BRYCE: Huh? Oh, yeah.
BRYCE: I mean, nothing would stop her. I was about to tell her to get lost whe n the weirdest thing happe ned. I could nt believe it. There I was holding hands with this stra nge girl. How did I get i nto this mess?
PATSY: Well, hello. I see youve met my son.
JULI: Uh-huh.
BRYCE: Finally, I did the only manly thi ng available whe n youre 7 years old. [BELL RINGING]
BRYCE: However, my troubles were far from over. The minute I walked into Miss Yels ons classroom...
JULI: Bryce? Youre here.
BRYCE: ...it was clear: School would not be a san ctuary.
[CHILDREN LAUGHING]
KID 1: Hey, Bryce, wheres your girlfrie nd?
BRYCE: I was bran ded for life.
KID 2: Hey, Bryce, why dont you ask her to marry you?
GIRLS [SINGING]: Bryce
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